Learning God's Heart

I am a blessed young mom of three! I have Milo who is four, Maverick who is three, and God gifted us with our first girl this past year, Holland, who is one! I have the opportunity to stay home with these precious babies, and I absolutely love being a mom. It is the hardest, most sanctifying, yet fulfilling calling the Lord has graciously given me.

A scripture that I love and that has been a big prayer for me as I parent these babies is Solomon’s prayer in 1 Kings 3:9–10: “Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, that I may discern between good and evil, for who is able to govern this your great people?” It pleased the Lord that Solomon had asked this.

I don’t always know what my children need, but God does. He knows them better than I do and loves them more than I ever could. And He delights in giving wisdom generously! When we ask, He gives us eyes to see what our children need. One of the most impactful truths that has shaped my motherhood is this: learn God’s heart and parent like He does.

When I had my first son, I really felt the Lord leading me to learn His heart — who He is, how He responds to us when we mess up, how He disciplines and corrects. As God began showing me more of who He is and how He cares for me, I realized the opportunity in front of me: I can either reflect God’s loving, caring heart to my children, or I can distort their view of Him by how I parent. No pressure, right? But here’s the good news: God specializes in restoration. Which means where I fall short and fail my kids (which I do every day), He has the power to come in and restore, re-wire, and redeem my mistakes. I can pray and trust Him to do what I cannot. Praise God for that!

Scripture is full of descriptions of God’s heart, but one of the clearest is Galatians 5:22–23, the Fruit of the Spirit: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” There is not a day that goes by that these attributes don’t come to my mind in correlation to pa renting.

It can be so tempting to get angry and impatient after I have repeated myself what feels like 50 times in a day and want to lash out and yell at the kids. Sadly, I have given into this temptation many times. But if I want to parent like God, my response will always be loving and gentle, patient and kind. Not that I let sin slide, because God doesn’t, but it means that I correct and discipline with love. There is a big difference between reacting and responding. A response is thought out and intentional; a reaction is whatever you are feeling in that moment. It takes predetermined thought and intention, and the power of the Holy Spirit, to respond like God does.

I often have to pause and pray, take a deep breath and ask God to help me respond Spirit-led to my child, to give me His heart and His words. I want to be someone who responds rather than reacts. And more specifically than that, I want my response to be a godly one.

God is the only One who can grow these fruits in my heart and in the hearts of my children. I pray often that God would grow His fruit in me and that I wouldn’t only tell my children about Him, but also show them His character. I pray the same for them, and God gives me opportunities every day to see where His fruit needs to grow. When they’re unkind to each other, I point them to these verses and have them pray for God to grow kindness in their hearts. He is the only One who can.

It’s funny, there have been so many moments when I’m teaching my kids something, and the Holy Spirit uses my own words to convict me. I used to think my purpose as a parent was simply to teach and sanctify my kids, but God is showing me that He is using my kids to teach and sanctify me.

God is parenting me as I parent them. Parenting might be one of His greatest tools of sanctification. May we not resist it.

Prayer Points:

• God, thank You for entrusting me with these children. I pray that You would give me wisdom and eyes to see what Your children need. You know better than I do; equip me as I train up Your people.

• God, would You let me have a correct view of Your heart? Help me to see clearly how You love and parent me so that I can show the same love and care to my children. Would You expose and rewire any distorted views I may have of You.

• God, would You help me to release my desire to be the “perfect mom” and help me to confidently rely on You to redeem what I don’t get right. Protect my children’s view of You; instill in them at a young age who You are and the love You have for them.

• God, would You grow Your fruit in my heart and the hearts of my children. Grow in me love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Let these fruits be what marks my parenting.

• God, would You continue to sanctify me and help me not resist what You want to do in my heart!

God, I thank You that You give us the gift of raising children. That You kindly give us a small glimpse of Your vast love for us through the experience and heart of being a mom. I pray that You would give us wisdom as we raise Your children. Give us eyes to see what You are doing and how You are working. Would You use us to influence our children’s lives and point them to You! Help us not just tell our children who You are, but show them. Grow Your fruit in our hearts — grow in us love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Let these nine characteristics be what defines our parenting. Help us to parent like You! God, we ask that where we fail, You would come in and redeem. Grow in our hearts and our children’s hearts a deep love for You! Help us to raise the next generation of passionate Jesus followers!

It is in Jesus’ Name I ask all of these things. Amen.

Madison Hartley

Mid-Way Baptist Church

Flourish Women's Ministry

www.mid-way.com/women